Page 33 - BIKC - Eng

RESTRICTING ASSOCIATION WITH WOMEN 15

In Kåñëa consciousness, man is good and woman is good; but,
in the conditional stage, the combination is always dangerous. 38
Better to be careful than sorry. Even in the short history of
ISKCON, we have seen many stalwart, sincere devotees (including
sannyäsés) fall down because of carelessness and complacency in
dealing with women. “In our Kåñëa consciousness movement it is
advised that the sannyäsés and brahmacärés keep strictly aloof from
the association of women so that there will be no chance of their
falling down again as victims of lusty desires.” 39
The material world is so designed that unless one goes to the
jungles or mountains, he must have some dealings with the
opposite sex. In the modern world there is no protection for
brahmacärés; man-woman relationships are quite free (which is the
beginning of all hellish life, and quite unsuitable for spiritual
progress).
ISKCON brahmacärés have to deal with women (both
devotees and nondevotees) a lot more than traditional
brahmacärés did, and in less favorable circumstances. Dealings
with women should he formal, polite—and as little as possible. If
some talk must be there, keep your distance (stand well apart),
avoid eye contact, and finish the business as soon as possible.
Never get into an argument with a woman. Strict brahmacärés do
not attend marriage ceremonies, watch dramas with parts played
40
by women, 41 or see women dancing or hear their singing. 42 The
general principle to avoid intimate association must be strictly
maintained. It is foolish to think that one can freely mix with the
opposite sex and remain unagitated. Even the great brahmacäré
Bhéñmadeva expressed that he could not save himself if he were to
associate with young girls. 43
Nor should brahmacärés accept service from women (even
prasäda service should be separate). It is especially dangerous for
a brahmacäré to see and talk to the same woman repeatedly. Once
a friendly relationship is established, the downfall of the
brahmacäré has begun.
Remember, women are powerful. Caesar controlled a mighty
empire, but Cleopatra controlled Caesar. Of course, having to